This Is Fun!

I just came back from a meeting with one of my 2010 brides and her parents. We were discussing all sorts of aspects of the upcoming wedding -- the ceremony music, the music for cocktails, dinner, and dancing, and last but not least, some ideas I had for adding personal and unique elements to the reception. At one point, the bride's mother exclaimed, "This is fun!"

Now, THAT was a good meeting. Because I really want my clients to look upon wedding planning -- or at least that part of it they undertake with me -- as FUN. I very much hope that when we're talking about special songs we'll play, or how I'll be introducing the wedding party, and so on, they're getting into the joyous spirit of the thing.

Occasionally, I meet with wedding couples who give me the impression that all this planning is some sort of burdensome, unwelcome chore. This can be for many reasons. For one thing, let's face it, some folks just are not naturally cheerful as others -- and none of us wake up feeling bright-eyed and bushy-tailed very day. For another thing, yes, wedding planning can be stressful at times.

But I would urge you to try and get into "that happy place" and approach wedding planning for what it should be -- FUN. Think of all the good feelings and all the love you want to feel on your wedding day, and then start feeling anticipatory joy during all the months when you're planning that special day!

10 Things I'm Thankful For

Some random things I’m thankful for this Thanksgiving, in no particular order (except for the first) …..

(1) My son (the light of my life, and he’s coming back east to visit for the holiday!)

(2) The Enlightenment (it was, and still is, a great idea!)

(3) O.V. Wright & the Hi Rhythm Section of Memphis (who recorded the deepest soul music ever!)

(4) The Baltimore Orioles (although they’ve been bad so long, I still remember the good years!)

(5) Trees (any of them and all of them – including the Ents)

(6) The Marx Brothers (Groucho, Chico, and Harpo – but not Zeppo or Karl)

(7) Roast turkey (why do we have to wait until Thanksgiving to eat real turkey – so delicious! – rather than that processed, tasteless stuff served on sandwiches the other 364 days of the year!)

(8) My collection of the Complete Works of Mark Twain (to me, reading him is like sharing quality time with an old friend!)

(9) The neighborhood where I live, Takoma Park, Maryland (I love the look and feel of the place, the way everyone’s house and front yard is different!)

(10) All my wonderful clients who accord me the pleasure and privilege of helping to make their wedding celebrations fun and memorable!


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44 Weddings, 42 First Dance Songs (2009)

As the year draws to a close, I thought it'd be fun to compile and post a complete list of the First Dance songs chosen by my 2009 wedding couples (including two whose weddings are coming up over the next few weekends).

The list is refreshingly diverse: old standards, indie rock, R&B ballads, classic rock, country, a Broadway show tune, a Latin song.

Many of the songs were already on the extensive list of suggested First Dance songs I give my clients; a few were new to me but are now included in my suggested list; and a few were outlier picks that I don't expect to use again (which is fine, the First Dance choice is very much the bride and groom's personal choice).

Of the songs below, only two were used more than once by my 2009 wedding couples:  Etta James' "At Last" and Ben Folds' "The Luckiest."  I performed at 44 weddings this year, and played 42 different First Dance songs, sung by 39 different artists. (Besides Etta James and Ben Folds, the Foo Fighters and Frank Sinatra were represented twice.)

Here's the honor roll: the First Dances of Good Note's 2009 newlyweds:

Allison Krauss, “When You Say Nothing At All”
Babyface, “Every Time I Close My Eyes”
Beach Boys, “God Only Knows”
Ben E. King, “Stand By Me”
Ben Folds, “The Luckiest”
Ben Harper, “Forever”
Big & Rich, “Eternity”
Bobby Darin, “Nightingale Sang in Berkeley Square”
Brad Paisley, “Then” 
Chicago, “You’re the Inspiration”
Johnny Hartman with John Coltrane, “My One and Only Love”
Eric Benet, “Spend My Life With You”
Etta James, “At Last”
Etta James, “Sunday Kind of Love”
Eva Cassidy, “Songbird”
Foo Fighters, “Miracle”
Foo Fighters, “Everlong” (acoustic version) 
Frank Sinatra, “Love Is Here to Stay”
Frank Sinatra,“Night and Day”
Frankie Valli, “Can’t Take My Eyes Off You”
Harry Connick Jr, “The Way You Look Tonight”
Israel "Iz" Kamakawiwo'ole, “Over the Rainbow”
James Morrison, “Better Man”
Jason Mraz ,“I’m Yours”
Josie de Guzman, “If I Were a Bell” [from Broadway's "Guys and Dolls"]
Journey, “Open Arms”
Juanes, “La vida es un Ratico”
Lionel Richie, “Stuck on You”
Little Big Town, “To Know Love”
Lone Star, “Amazed”
Norah Jones, “Come Away With Me”
Oasis, “Let There Be Love”
Prince,“Adore”
Rachael Yamagata, “Meet Me By The Water”
Rascal Flatts, “Bless the Broken Road”  
Sam & Dave, “Hold On I’m Coming”
Sister Hazel, “This Kind of Love”
Stevie Wonder, “You Are the Sunshine of My Life”
The Notwist,  “Consequence”
Tom Waits, “Sea of Love” 
Van Morrison, “Crazy Love”
Wings (with Paul McCartney), “My Love”

District Weddings feature story

Thanks to the good folks at District Weddings, a leading Washington DC area wedding blog that does a great job covering the gamut of wedding topics, for doing a feature interview with me, published today (Nov. 19).

In my interview, I make some of the same points I've made on various posts on my own blog, but I share some new ideas and perspectives as well.

p.s. Thanks to Stephen Bobb/Love Life Images for the photos. (By the way, that Bose L-1 speaker I'm standing next to in one of the photos is about 7.5 feet tall. That's one of the speakers I typically use at weddings. They're great -- sleek-looking and clear-as-a-bell sound.)

Happy 100th Birthday, Johnny Mercer

One of the joys of being a wedding DJ is the opportunity to share with people the glorious musical repertoire known as the "Great American Songbook." Those are the classic, jazzy songs written in the 1920s through 1950s and made famous by singers like Frank Sinatra, Nat King Cole, Ella Fitzgerald, and Fred Astaire. They continue to charm audiences in new renditions by contemporary crooners like Michael Buble and Diana Krall and through their insertion in so many Hollywood romantic movies. This was in fact THE popular music in America in the pre-rock'n'roll era.

Today marks the 100th birthday of one of the greatest songwriters from those Tin Pan Alley days:  Johnny Mercer, born November 18, 1909 in Savannah, Georgia.  Best known as a lyricist, he was also a popular singer in his day, and he co-founded Capitol Records.

You can thank Johnny Mercer for such romantic favorites as "Satin Doll" (co-written with Duke Ellington), "Moon River" (co-written with Henry Mancini), "Come Rain or Come Shine" (co-written with Harold Arlen), and "Too Marvelous for Words" (co-written with Richard Whiting).

He also wrote such of the best "torch" songs -- sad ballads like "Blues In the Night," "One for My Baby (One More for the Road," and "Autumn Leaves," which I'm less likely to play at your wedding but which are beautiful, haunting tunes.

Overall, he wrote or co-wrote over 1,200 songs, hundreds of them hits or featured prominently in movies and Broadway shows. He must have died a very rich man, but I don't begrudge him his millions in song royalties --he enriched our lives forever, and his tunes continue to enrich wedding receptions to this day.

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Peter Merry, Wedding Guru

I spent two very fruitful days this past week (November 11 & 12) attending an intensive, advanced workshop for wedding entertainers led by Peter Merry -- truly one of the smartest, most successful, and dedicated people I have ever met in the wedding industry.

His approach combines creative ideas and hard work -- including lots of advance planning -- to raise the bar for wedding DJs (in fact, he prefers the term "wedding entertainment director" to signify how much more a professional wedding "DJ" does than just "spin music").

When it comes to creating weddings that are more fun, more memorable, and more personal, lots of wedding professionals talk the talk, but Peter really and truly walks the walk -- and he's leading others like me down that same path.

If you are a wedding DJ, I recommend you attend one of Peter's "Professional Process" workshops.

If you are a bride or groom, I urge you to buy Peter's book "The Best Wedding Reception ... Ever".
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Having Fun WIth Your Grand Entrance

I just returned from a very, very successful wedding reception at the lovely Elkridge Furnace Inn this Saturday night (I'm writing this 1:00 AM Sunday.)   It was successful in many respects -- everything went smoothly, the food was wonderful, the toasts were memorable, the crowd had a great time, and of course there was LOTS of dancing ... the dance floor was packed all night. It was an elegant reception, but very high-energy and fun.

One thing that contributed to this, I think, was the way we did the Grand Entrance. The couple, Sarah and Miles, did not want to do a traditional Grand Entrance, where guests are seated as the wedding party and the newlywed couple are announced into the room.  So we tried something different, and it was a hit!

Instead of the guests being seated for the Grand Entrance, they were invited to stand on the dance floor, leaving a path in the middle.

Instead of the whole wedding party being introduced, it was just the bride and groom.

And instead of them walking into the room, they practically ran on to the dance floor and immediately started dancing to a rock 'n roll tune they had selected (Katrina & the Waves' "Walking on Sunshine"), pulling in other guests to join them in this pre-dinner dance (which wasn't hard because the guests were already there on the dance floor). 

It was such a high-energy entrance, and we extended that energy with one more upbeat song (Black Eyed Peas' "I Gotta Feeling") before inviting the guests to take their seats.

This kick-off shifted the reception into high gear, and it pretty much stayed there the rest of the night!

In future posts, I'll talk about other types of fun, high-energy Grand Entrances.

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Preview of My New Ad

Pardon this advertisement for myself, but I'm very happy with my new print ad, which will appear in the January 2010 Washingtonian Bride & Groom Magazine.

Thanks for Rebecca Schwartz of design4dc@gmail.com for providing the graphic design for the new ad ... and thanks to my old friend Dick Bangham of RipBang Productions, who designed the Good Note logo way back when.

The Marbecca "Love Story" - A Special Touch for Your Reception

For couples looking to add a very personal touch to their wedding reception, one special service a properly trained DJ can offer you is to read aloud just prior to your First Dance the story of how you met and fell in love and got engaged.

This concept was originated in 1989 by the acclaimed West Coast DJ/entertainment team of Mark and Rebecca Ferrell, who crafted and refined it over a decade before offering workshops to teach the concept to other professionals. Mark and Rebecca call it “The Love Story.” When I do it, I simply refer to it as a “personalized” or “enhanced” introduction, but the concept and method is the same I learned directly from them at a Marbecca Method Love Story workshop I attended in August 2005.

One key to the success of this concept is that the bride and groom separately share their love story in their own words with their DJ in advance, answering a series of questions he asks each of them. Then, the DJ takes the two sets of answers and edits them into a script to be read aloud at your reception.

This presentation becomes a very unique and memorable moment during your reception. It can be sentimental and/or humorous – usually, both – and it never fails to get a good reaction from your guests, who enjoy being “let in on” your personal love story.

After years working with this concept, Mark and Rebecca found that many DJs who attempted to emulate it simply lacked the training, knowledge, or writing and speaking skills to do it right. And done poorly, it can be boring or even embarrassing.

If you’re using a DJ who’s a Marbecca workshop graduate, consider asking him to include the Love Story at your reception. If you’re a DJ looking to upgrade your skill sets and offer a unique service to wedding couples, consider attending a future Marbecca workshop.

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Wedding Venues - A DJ's Perspective

It’s funny. Venues are often asked by wedding couples to recommend DJs, but DJs are rarely asked to recommend venues.  This, even though an experienced wedding DJ has hands-on, real-world experience performing at scores, if not hundreds, of wedding reception sites in his region.

If that DJ is paying careful attention when he works at each venue, he’ll observe all sorts of things about the place. Big things. Little things. Good things. Bad things.

How practical are the logistics?  How well are the details managed? How friendly are the staff? How does the place look under different lighting conditions? How suitable are the spaces for cocktails, dinner, and dancing? Does the place have strict curfews or does it allow the party to continue another hour if you want it to? Your DJ may be able to give you insight on all this, and more.

Even during the planning phase, the DJ will learn first-hand from wedding couples about their interactions with the venue coordinators – how flexible and accommodating are they?

Beyond that, an experienced wedding DJ probably knows of venues that meet whatever criteria you’re looking for.  Are you interested in a rustic venue, or a very urbane one?  A big hotel or boutique hotel? A place by the Bay or in the mountains? A place that is architecturally distinctive, whether  historic or ultra-modern? A place with beautiful gardens or a drop-dead gorgeous ballroom or a breathtaking view?  Your DJ might suggest places you otherwise might not have considered.

So don’t hesitate to get your DJ’s input on your choice of wedding venues – and once you’ve chosen a venue, get his input on how to utilize that venue.  Not that the DJ's is the final word -- but his input might help inform your planning.  Likewise, get the input of other experienced wedding vendors who’ve spent countless hours working at various venues – such as photographers, videographers, caterers.

Maybe it’s just a pipedream on my part, but I think there are times it would even make sense to hire the DJ and photographer first, and the venue second!

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Rock'N'Roll Wedding Bands

Interesting article in the Sunday (Nov. 1) New York Times about what the reporter terms "one of New York’s premier wedding bands for people who would never dream of hiring a wedding band." The group, The Dexter Lake Club Band, is a raucous rock band with a rakish rock'n'roll attitude -- not the typical tuxedo-clad all-purpose wedding band. Yet they specialize in wedding gigs.

The article portrays the group as a fun alternative to the traditional wedding band, but not without some drawbacks.

The band plays a wide range of popular covers, but unabashedly balks at playing others, even if requested. A more conventional wedding band (or DJ) will play whatever the bride and groom and their families and friends wish to hear.

This band actually puts a clause in its contract giving them access to the bar.  Normally, a professional wedding vendor would never dream of drinking on the job, much less demand it!

And, if the article is to be believed, the group will at times purposely play unappealing songs if they feel put upon by the mother of the bride or aren't happy with the vendor meal.  That rebellious stance befits the rock'n'roll mystique but strikes me as sketchy when we're talking about somebody's wedding!

Two rock'n'roll/R&B bands here in the Washington DC area that qualify as nontraditional wedding bands but without the naughty behavior of the group profiled in the Times -- are The Grandsons and The Johnny Artis Band .  Both bands listed as among Washingtonian Magazine's "Best Wedding Vendors" (as, I'm proud to say, am I).

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